| I hope you enjoy my golf playing tips. This | | | | 6) The ducks on the driving range are not for |
| is my top 10 list of sorts; it contains | | | | target practice. Besides if you start aiming |
| helpful insights into the game of golf and | | | | for them, the other birds might start aiming |
| the psyche it requires. Remember to read this | | | | for you. |
| with a grain of salt (around the rim | | | | |
| preferably). | | | | 7) Let faster players go on ahead of you, |
| | | | especially in the beginning, besides it's |
| 1) This is a game, only a game, it is not war | | | | always better to be behind in golf, most |
| and your neighbor is not the enemy. This | | | | people don't shoot backwards if you know what |
| should go without saying but feuds have begun | | | | I mean. |
| and never ended over the exciting sport of | | | | |
| golf. You should especially keep this in mind | | | | 8) If you are having a bad round of golf, |
| when playing your boss, there is no shame in | | | | start playing silly shots. You just might |
| letting your boss win. | | | | find your game improves when you stop being |
| | | | too serious. Seriously. |
| 2) The only person you should ever really | | | | |
| play against is yourself. It sounds silly, | | | | 9) Be considerate of those around you. Wear a |
| but keep your old score cards; take note of | | | | belt and tuck in your shirt please. No one |
| improvements and declines (while everyone has | | | | wants to see a full moon in the middle of the |
| a bad day a consistent decline could indicate | | | | afternoon, especially one that is reflected |
| a problem with your game). If you play only | | | | by the sun. |
| against yourself there really can't be any | | | | |
| hard feelings when the game is over. | | | | 10) Unless you want to be the take and bake |
| | | | of the day, be sure you pack your sunscreen. |
| 3) The looser always buys the beer. This | | | | Lobster is great on the menu, not on the golf |
| works well if you are playing against | | | | course. Besides we deal with enough pain on |
| yourself as I recommended. That way you are | | | | the course without adding to it. |
| only buying beer for one. It makes for a much | | | | |
| cheaper date. | | | | I hope you realize that my top 10 list is |
| | | | somewhat tongue in cheek. There are however |
| 4) If all seems lost and you have no club | | | | some pearls of wisdom in there, particularly |
| that will get the job done, a good nice kick | | | | about the ducks. My overall point is that |
| could be in order (enough said). | | | | golf, while challenging is supposed to be |
| | | | recreational. In other words, you're supposed |
| 5) Save the beer for the clubhouse and not | | | | to have fun. I hope my little list reminds |
| the course. Hot beer tastes bad and you | | | | you of that very fact and you think of this |
| should never, ever drink and drive. You also | | | | the next time you are getting ready for a |
| never want to drive backwards on a golf | | | | game of golf (particularly as you dress, see |
| course (see number 7). | | | | number 9). |
| | | | |